Postal Letter - which way would i be happier?

which way would i be happier?

i'm a dude...about 16, and i think i'm confused out of my freakin' mind!!!! ok, so in a dream last night...i saw what i thought were 2 life choices...in other words, 2 completely different choices i could make in life. i saw 2 images...well, more like MOVIES of ways my life could go...at age 28. one is me, single, living in an old house, riding motorcycles, working on old cars, and doing what i want, continuing on with my composing, and leaving and riding my motorcycle across america as i please, for months at a time...not having to tell anyone about it...me doing what i want, when i want...not at all interested in finding a girlfriend, or settling down, completely free, listening to classic rock, and riding a custom honda goldstar down the open highway, somewhere in arizona, or new mexico, on a desert highway, stopping only to eat or sleep...leaving the house, and coming back to it months later, and mowing the lawn which grows super tall, and i have neighbors complaining about my house, and all the neighbors' kids seem to love me, they come over to my garage, and i teach them about working on cars, mainly old mustangs, 'cudas, and old challengers, until i decide to leave again, and i loved life just the way it was... the other one was me at the same age...apparently married to a girl at my school who is just my friend right now, and instead of a wedding ring, she has a ring tattooed on her finger, and it has my name on it. i have a tattooed ring, with her name on it...and i'm driving a 2011 Jeep grand cherokee with 3 kids in the back seat screaming...a girl who looks like a 6 year old version of her mother, with a jacket that her mother wore every day, and its huge and floppy...and the sleeves go over her hands...a boy, about 4 or 5, who looks just like a 4 year old version of me, with the same weird haircut i had at that age...with a hat i LOVED to wear 3 years ago...and a little baby, could not tell the gender, seems to be a few weeks old, in the middle...the girl on the mother's side of the car, the boy on mine, and the baby in the middle...we were in a huge city in this dream...a storm begins, like a huge thunderstorm, and we stop by the side of the road for some reason, and we trade drivers...the mother gets in the driver seat...we keep driving then i saw myself at about 40 something...one version of me riding motorcycles, still doing what i do, but my music takes off, and i'm writing dark, demented songs for famous bands, like Avenged Sevenfold, All That Remains, and some new band called Blank PaperCut...and i still work on old cars, but at this point, i sell them, and own a chain of body shops around the country. i seem happy enough, though the other one, shows me at about 40-something, still married to my friend...with the kids, older now, and there is a 4th one, another boy, but he's somewhat demented and commits suicide, which hurts everyone horribly. my musical career doesn't take off, and i own a small music shop, selling instruments to local bands...getting enough money to survive for the family... i would LOVE a musical career, writing songs for my favorite bands, but, now, only since this dream, i know that i really want to be more than friends with her...i swear, i only looked at us as friends, but now, i see how much we're alike...how we like the same kind of music, how we like the same kind of humor, how as kids we loved the dark when other kids feared it, and how we both pretty much have the same kind of style...in winter, we both wear hoodies, with earbuds hanging around the neck...and only now, i think how awesome and beautiful she really is, but i also know how much i want my freedom to leave when i want, and to go off walking the streets in the dark at night, on my own will, my freedom to have multiple old cars torn apart in my yard, my freedom to leave the toilet seat up, and go buy as big a TV as i want, to mess with the FedEx dude when he brings me a package...to have some time by myself, to do whatever i watn to do...but, i'm confused out of my freaking mind, and not have to deal with the suicide of a child... i know life probably won't turn out the way it does in these dreams if i choose either, but i think God is giving me an insight into whether i should try to have a family or not...and if so who to have it with...it would be freaky if things went completely as they did in the dreams if i did either plan...

Public Comments

Of course, who wouldn't want the first life you described, happy-go-lucky? I hope you were rich because you'll need an abundance of money to live that way. The second sounds good too. Here's the thing, though. You can only take life one second at a time; you 'can' decide what you want, but don't be surprised if you change your mind later on. Don't do your girlfriend any 'favors' by marrying her. Neither of you would be happy because you didn't get to fulfil your dream. You want to be a musician and can afford it, then you should. Let the rest just fall in place. But you do have to have money and a plan. Good luck.
Here's the thing thats a normal life having kids, growing up, everything in that picture is a symptom of life(your kids suicide would be a highly unlikely scenario and thats f-ed up but) and why im saying yes to the soccer dad thing, is because hopefully youll learn to appreciate life.
why not do both? if she likes you surely she'd want you to be happy and following your dreams? maybe you could start your music career and work on cars in your garage how you want, and you can hang out with this girl how you want I don't understand why you think it's a choice between being happy and having a family, and being happy with your music/car career. Why not just make music how you like, work on cars how you like, and if it happens with this girl well that's pretty awesome too. don't think you should be considering putting aside your career for a girl - but neither should you put aside a girl for your career. If she loves you, she loves you doing what you do, so do it. If she doesn't want you to do what you want, she doesn't love you anyway.